To Skirt a Predator
And let’s face it, it’s unlikely you’ll be able to outrun the attacker in your crazy fuck me pumps that baited him in the first place.
Thank goodness for your trusty anti-rape skirt-cum-vending machine!
Actually, thank the Japanese (natch). That’s right, a visionary Japanese designer has created a skirt that converts into a life-size vending machine that women can hide behind to outwit predators.
Here’s how it works:
Sexy and practical! Sheer brilliance.
I absolutely love this idea. It’s totally something Velma from Scooby Doo would do. And your assailant will more than likely be trailing you by a good, oh, half a mile, so you’ll have plenty of time to make the transformation.
However, there is one catch. After chasing you for blocks, the rapist is bound to be thirsty for a Squirt. So you must be prepared and carry change and an assortment of sodas on your person lest you be shaken and kicked repeatedly when you don’t deliver.
I’ve ordered one for each day of the week. I can’t wait to try it out!