5 Tips for Vacation Sex
Vacation season is finally here, and that means this girlie is outta here starting next week, suckas. Sadly, it also means you won’t see a whole lotta me around these […]
6 Annoying Facebook Posts I Shall Never Make
Hey guys! Guess what? I finally signed up for that super hot social media site that everyone is talking about! You know, the really popular one with all the pictures […]
Why Jason Bateman Is the Most Perfect Man Alive
It is no secret — I am head over heels, entirely and gaga-rifically insane for Jason Bateman. I have professed my love and lust for him many times — on […]
A Collection of Posts That Will Cheer You Up on Valentine’s Day
Happy Singles Awareness Day! That’s right, I have learned that February 14 is officially SAD. I cannot think of a more fitting moniker, as there is no other day on […]
15 Reasons Why Being Single On Valentine’s Day Rocks
Hey guys, I created a post over on BuzzFeed about our most favorite day of the year! No, not Penis Day – Valentine’s Day, silly! So please, please go over […]
Six Reasons Why I Hate New Year’s Eve
I have a confession to make: I fucking hate New Year’s Eve. I’ve honestly had it with the overwhelming social pressure to go-out-and-have-a-fuck-ton-of-fun-or-else on this most overhyped night of the […]
The Vicious Cycle of Online Dating
After a substantial dating hiatus, I’ve recently re-entered the vile, reprehensible, obviously-created-by-the-devil world of online dating. After being away for so long, I somehow forgot that not long ago I […]
I Hate Everyone, But I Love You Joan Rivers
Hello everyone! I know I disappeared for a spell but I’m back and I’ve got my fancy thong on. And by fancy I mean there are no holes in it. In this post I’d like to give a great, big shake of the boobies to one of my favorite comics […]
Not Everyone is Going to Like You
Ooh, harsh words, huh? I bet your momma never told you that, did she? Oh, heavens no. Momma said, “Oh, poopsie, you’re so wonderful and special, anyone would be crazy not to love you!” Listen, I’m sure Momma means well and everything, but she’s seeing you through her extremely biased […]
If You’ve Got a Camera and a Penis, Read This
Hey guys, what’s up? Your penis. Right. Very funny. And original, I might add. And speaking of unoriginal matters involving Mr. Winky, I’ve got a question for you: What’s up […]
